Camping Cooking disasters

[vanNek]

Had a metho bottle stored in our Trangia nest... it leaked. 2 nights of taste deterrent tasting fodd.....


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[Overlandman]

A great topic back on the front page.
It’s been a few months since the last post
Keep the stories coming

[flingebunt]

The worst was one time I went camping with some friends, a few who considered themselves to be proper bushies. So often they would cook proper food when camping, which was great.

However, this time they decided to cook spit roast chicken and ham (for 3 of the nights). Do you know how long it takes to spit roast a chicken. It takes hours. First you need a big fire, then you wait until it turns to coals, then you have to put the chicken over these for 5 hours. After a long day, the last thing you want to do is wait up until 10 pm to eat dinner.

Oh, and yes it was really delicious. The combination smoke and the fact that we were basting them in pineapple juice from the canned fruit that we brought with us made them extra delicious.

[Huntsman247]

Took a mix of friends on a difficult exploritory day trip. At lunch time we stopped by a river were one guy pulls out a Backcountry meal and since he doesn't normally come hiking i was surpassed that he brought a stove to boil some water. Upon expressing my surprise that he'd bought a stove he replied with a blank look asking 'Do you need hot water for these?' I thought I did well to keep it together.
However that didn't last as I lost it when he tried to 'heat' the cold river water in the food packet under his arm pits and then after 10mins proceed to eat sand sounding satay.... He gave up after a couple spoons. Lol.
All he had left was a tube of condensed milk... He was absolutely smashed at the end of the day.

[Lophophaps]

Hunstman247, LOL! That will take some beating. I've been caught a few times and there was no way to heat dinner, so I soaked it for about 20 minutes. Freeze dry, dehydrated and even two minutes noodles were quite okay if a bit unappetising.

[Warin]

However, this time they decided to cook spit roast chicken and ham (for 3 of the nights). Do you know how long it takes to spit roast a chicken. It takes hours.

Some people I know do a roast lamb.
They buy a butchered lamb from the local farmer and have now worked out a spit roasting system for it. It does take some hours .. but it is now much better that their first attempts .. raw meat was the product earl on, usually burnt on the end of a fork to get some cooking into smaller bits before it was chewed down.

[Huntsman247]

Hunstman247, LOL! That will take some beating. I've been caught a few times and there was no way to heat dinner, so I soaked it for about 20 minutes. Freeze dry, dehydrated and even two minutes noodles were quite okay if a bit unappetising.

Haha it was priceless. I'll let him know he should have 'warmed' it for a bit longer. Lol

[Rexyviney36]

Camping at Cosy Corner years ago: a fella we were with wanted to prove to us he could cook premium steak on the trangia but it was taking a LONG time.
About an hour into it we were mercilessly slating the poor bugger, but he was determined.
We had all eaten and were settling in nicely by the fire with a few drinks when he announced his steak was finally medium-rare and perfect. As he went to lift it into the al foil to rest, the tongs lost grip and his ‘slow cooked’ prime cut fell oh so slowly to The Gardens’ famous black sand.....
Ole mate was *&%$#! devastated.

[flingebunt]

However, this time they decided to cook spit roast chicken and ham (for 3 of the nights). Do you know how long it takes to spit roast a chicken. It takes hours.

Some people I know do a roast lamb.

Nothing beats the taste of meat roasted over an open fire. Makes me want to try it again, as long as I don't have to wait for it.

[bogholesbuckethats]

Some friends of ours had made us some delicious custard on a very cold night on the central plateau. We tried to emulate it a few months later at lake tahune but it wasn't cold enough to set and we also managed to burn some to the bottom of the pot.

Fast forward two weeks and we were passing through customs in Queenstown NZ when my partner started to get some very special attention from the sniffer dog. We had to pull everything out of our packs and eventually we opened the pot and found a microcosm of mould covering the entire pot and food bowls that had started from the burnt custard. We haven't tried cooking custard since.

[ChrisJHC]

Was hiking the Great South West Walk a few years ago when a group staggered into the first campsite right on dark (probably 8pm or so).
They then proceeded to pull raw potatoes, carrots etc out of their packs and start to peel them before cooking them in a big pot.
I'm not sure what time they finally ate as I went to bed at 10 and they still hadn't finished cooking.

The next day they announced that they were pulling out of the walk as their packs were so heavy!

[Peterac]

Im a teacher and I use to take particularly challenging (aggressive, angry, oppositional) teenagers out bush for the day. One day there were 3 students and I going for a camp cook. They were asked to bring along their own meat to cook. Two brought sausages the other brought the biggest lump of steak cut In two pieces Ok good so far they were invested as they brought along something of their own. I had a routine, one get kindling, one run the fire, the other organise the milo, tea, food plates etc. it kept everyone busy. Steak boy was on the kindling and collecting. These boys were prone to playing practical jokes on each other where the sense of humour was usually lost somewhere along the line. Anyway these three got along pretty well. At some point there was a commotion as steak boy started accusing the food and drink prepper of hiding one of his steaks as a joke. He was kind of proud of the side of cow he brought along and wasn’t happy. Matter of fact he was winding up as the other boy looked bewildered and innocent! Body language tells a lot, three of us were having a giggle expecting one of the gigglers to quickly pull the steak out of hiding and for everyone to settle, laugh and enjoy the joke. Steak boy was slowly stewing and his tension and body language was building. Me still waiting for the joker to own up whilst employing my best conflict resolution skills. No good, steak boy did see the funny side for a moment but he was getting serious now. Steak boy and food prepper were now looking at each other differently! One accusing (logically deducing the culprit) the other now defensive because he was not being believed. The remaining steak was on the plate on the table between the boys. I was on the other side of the table forming the triangle. Suddenly the tension was broken as both boys watched a magpie swoop down between them, lift the remaining steak off the plate and fly away. Never happened before hasn’t happened since but had 3 out of 4 of us in stitches to start then steakless boy as well.

[andrewa]

Many many years ago, as a year 11 kid, I was leading a group of year 9 and 10 kids on a week long hike. I had cooked my pasta, and was rummaging in my pack for the sauce for it. One of the group members asked whether he could use my billy to cook his dinner, and I said yes. I found the sauce, and went to get my billy of pasta to mix it in, and found a pile of pasta at the base of a nearby tree, and the younger kid cooking his dinner in my billy!
A

[Peterac]

That’s funny Andrew as it sounds all too familiar! Hope you ate his meal.

[Overlandman]

A great topic back on the front page.
It’s been a few years since the last post
Keep the stories coming

Recap, This was my worst cooking disaster

On the overland track back in the 90's, I had been having 2 minuite noodles for a quick snack each day, you know, the ones with the seasoning sachets, then having fresh meat each night, steak days 1 & 2 , Bacon 3 & 4, Cabana day 5, anyway on day 6, I had my first dehydrated meal, (simallar to the back country meals) at Pine Valley. I put the sachet in towards the end of cooking, I noticed that the meal was dry & tasted weired. That night I didnt go to the loo, and needed to drink more water than usual. The next day I continued to drink more water & made my way to Narcissus hut. That evening I cooked another dehydrated meal, I went to put the seasoning sachet in & to my horror read on the sachet, DO NOT EAT, Silica Sachet.
Regards
Overlandman

[Lophophaps]

Overlandman, this too shall pass, and I don't mean Du Cane Gap.

[ggorgeman]

Annual boys fishing trip (car camping). I was quietly sitting in my tinny fishing 200m up-river from campsite when there was an almighty explosion. The Camp Cooks had put head beads (for the camp oven roast) in a large foil tray and were using the butane-canister stove-unit to fire up the heat beads. The large foil tray sat above the butane canister and the extreme heat from the beads caused the canister to explode. Fortunately, no-one in close proximity.

[walk2wineries]

Oddly mine have been from professional companies... Franklin river trip, guide company had provided everything but we took turns to help prep. My turn and the meat took some effort to cut up .. and my fingers were stinging a bit by the time i finished. From the salt, I later found out; he was stewing or braising corned beef that hadn't had the salt rinsed or soaked off, finished dish was a tad salty. And tough.

More recently a couple of vegan guides decided to cook one night - no particular need, we were town based with pubs, takeouts..... They made a veg curry. Well, I'm omniverous and partial to thai veg curries, indian vegetable dishes and to lentil dahl. This was sort of bottom-of-the-fridge-and-empty-the-cupboard with lentils, odd veg and quite a lot of very raw potato. And they had a proper kitchen!

I can however attest to the diligence of the sniffer dogs someone else noted; I was goosed by a beagle at Adelaide airport because I forgot I had an apple core in my jeans pocket.